I'm A Loser, Baby!

I always walk Mrs. TBF to the tram or the bus in the morning. If we walk to the tram early enough, we always see people standing outside the Migros waiting to get in when it opens at 8:00 a.m. Usually, I'll make some comment to Mrs. TBF that these people should "get a life" or that they're "losers" because they have nothing better to do than to wait for a grocery store to open. I mean, what could be so stinkin' important that you have to actually wait for the doors to open at precisely 8:00?

OK...maybe you're out of toilet paper. I'll give ya that one...

So, this morning we were walking to the tram at about 7:50, and I saw the "losers" standing at the Migros door. Realizing that I had planned to buy a few things at "the Meeg" on the way back to the apartment, I kind of hoped that Mrs. TBF's tram would take its own sweet time arriving at our stop so that...perish the thought...I'd end up standing with the "losers". As luck would have it, the tram came after a couple of minutes wait. I kissed Mrs. TBF goodbye, wiped her lipstick off my lips (as I do every morning), and walked at a snail's pace toward the Migros.

Despite the fact that had I walked any slower I would have been walking backwards, I still ended up making it to the Migros at 7:58 a.m. Two minutes later, at the precise moment that the local church bells began ringing, the Star Trek-like doors opened with a "phssssht", and I found myself in the middle of the "loser herd" being whisked through the door.

I recycled my PET containers, bought some mushrooms/tomatoes/Pepsi Light/kitty litter, and proceeded to the checkout. By the time I got there, there was not one other shopper in sight! I looked back around the store, and I couldn't see even one shopper...NOT EVEN ONE! Obviously, these people all came in for one thing, bought it, and left. "God, what losers!", I thought to myself...

Hey! Wait a minute...