Saturday, August 26, 2006

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-JECTED!

Iams has, for whatever reason (at least in Switzerland), decided that their cat food will from now on come in little "pouches" rather than in cans. As far as the packaging is concerned - I have no objections. Bringing the smelly, empty cans down to the recycling bin is not on the top of my list of favorite things to do, and the thought of just squeezing King's food out into a bowl and throwing out the little pouch was kind of appealing to me. No...no problem with packaging.

The problem is that Iams decided to also change the food. The first time I squeezed out the food, I noticed that Iams had changed from a finely mashed up, soft consistency to a new "soft nugget" format. I immediately sensed a potential problem due to the fact that King is missing a bunch of his teeth (give him a break...he's 18 years old), and I mashed up the nuggets (which weren't as soft as they could have been) as best I could with a fork and set down the bowl of food for "his majesty" on his little IKEA plastic placemat. King took a sniff, ate a little, and he walked away. I just figured he wasn't hungry, didn't give it a second thought, and I went off to the gym.

A few hours later, I walked in the front door of our apartment to find King standing about three feet in front of me. He gave me a vitriolic look, and produced a noise that I could only attempt to describe in writing as: "SCHKRAAAAAAAAAAAAAANNNXXXXXXX"! I walked toward the kitchen with King in hot, screeching pursuit to find that most of his "new" food was scattered all over the floor around his bowl. REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-JECTED!!!! I quickly filled his bowl with his old formula, canned Iams and watched as he inhaled the nasty sludge.

At first, only the "Ocean Fish" flavor came in the new pouch packaging. However, a couple of days ago when I went to Qualipet to restock King's supply of Iams cans, I noticed that there are now only pouches and no more cans at all. I had to think fast. I bought a few cans of Hill's Science Plan food and hoped for the best.

As it turned out, I opened the Science Plan can to find the food to be a very soft "mousse-like" consistency. I set it down in the "royal" eating area, and King inhaled it. Catastrophe averted!

King is now a Science Plan cat and will no longer be eating mass quantities of Iams. Iams is owned by Procter & Gamble (NYSE: PG). If you own any P & G stock - NOW might be a good time to sell!

14 comments:

The Sour Kraut said...

Leave it all to me. I will get your cans back. My very good friend's brother married the Iams' family's daughter. I am having dinner with her next week. I will take care of it. Nuff said.

The Big Finn said...

TSK -
Let me save you the trouble...
I don't think that the family-of-a-friend's-brother's-wife who has sold the company to P & G is going to be of any help. But, thanks anyway.
It's the thought that counts...

cncz said...

With all due respect to the King (he has earned it), I have known some weird cats in my time but King is well, strange.
How many cans does he eat a day?

The Big Finn said...

DP -
King normally eats about 1.5 cans per day. Plus, we feed him little bits of food from the dinner table: bacon, chicken, melon, pork, lamb, salmon, beef, tuna, doritos, Pringles, and probably a bunch of other things I can't really think of right now.

CanadianSwiss said...

I'm thankful that Dale still has all his teeth, but still, he's quite finniky about what we serve him.

The Medium Swede said...

"little bits of food from the dinner table" my arse! That cat eats more and better than I do.

Colon Blow said...

Given King's dietary habits, I for one am glad I don't have to clean out his litter box!

the-sour-kraut said...

Forget it then. Just suffer through with your pouches. I withdraw my offer to get your beloved cans back. With your attitude, you are flirting with blog probation.

Expat Traveler said...

LOL - now that is pretty funny, especially the recommendation.

Barry said...

Thanks for the invite TBF. I'm available whenever you are and when King's dietary requirements allow! Looking forward to finally getting to Basel and looking around.

The Medium Swede said...

This is a test comment

Michael said...

So glad that disaster was averted, as a prior cat owner I know what those beasts are capable of.

Well that's one reason to get rid of their stock the other is because they're apparently Satanists...or at least that's what the interwebs says!

The Medium Swede said...

So after a few days now, how are the bowel movements? Any difference?

The Big Finn said...

TMS -
Nasty, as usual